i hate my self...

I hated looking at my self... on stage, in front of a mirror and plain reflection.. I hated the thought of " me, myself and i" i hated taking pictures using my nikon camera , my z550i camera phone i hated... I hated, and i still hate it.. but i am trying... o so badly i am trying... I am trying to not hate it.. they see me as a camera freak ( not using the word cam whore .. XD ) taking pictures of myself.. little did they know, i am trying to not hate... Maybe i hated myself, giving my self this pressure , this very high hopes and very strict regulations that i myself cant fulfill... I am trying to put everything down , but by my self i cant but i wont insist on others helping me... what is wrong with me? But nonetheless i am trying .. trying very hard to not hate.. to trying to be fair and nice to my self...